Hi friends, welcome back to the blog. For those that are new, welcome, I’m Joshua, a seasoned wedding filmmaker based here in Roanoke, I’ve been filming for about 20 years and I travel all across the mid-Atlantic for wedding videos and films.
I was recently speaking with a couple about a 2020 wedding film and they stopped me while I was talking about their venue that I had filmed many times before and they simply asked me this:
“What should we know about weddings that no one tells people?!”
Well, I honestly had to think a couple minutes on that one as they had sorta thrown me off a bit wanting to know more about the wedding industry than wedding films. See, for those that don’t know me or know of me, I’m a bit of a wedding data junkie, when I’m not focused on clients, I’m researching, gathering large sums of data and information about the wedding industry, mostly here in South Western Virginia.
Today, I want to share with you three things that no one else if really going to tell you or provide insights about, so let’s dive right in!
It’s Never 100% Perfect
This happens all the time, the bride or the family will overthink the wedding day. Listen, no matter how much you plan, how much effort you put into the wedding day, something, even if it’s a minor thing, will go wrong. Listen, I’ve been to 500+ weddings in my lifetime and not even one has gone 100% right, 100% of the time.
My advice to couples getting married or parents that are highly involved with the wedding process for the kids, just chill. So what if it rains on your day and you have to move it indoors. It’s Okay.
I’ve had couples where the wedding cake didn’t arrive on time because of an accident, I’ve seen groomsmen completely drunk at the reception and make fools of themselves, I’ve seen DJ’s lose power because of an outage, I’ve seen family members fighting with each other, I’ve seen the brides sometimes have issues with fitting into their dress.
Just relax. Here’s the secret. No matter what, your wedding guests will honestly not care if the flowers are not what you ordered, maybe the bridesmaid dresses came in and their not the shade of blue that wanted, maybe your Uncle Joe is at the wedding and you didn’t invite him.
Much of the day will depend on how you and your soon to be spouse act. Even if you’re stressed, act like it doesn’t matter and it’s not a big deal. Keeping calm during your day will help those little issues seem like minor speed bumps and you’ll have a much more enjoyable time with the wedding day.
If you stress over these things and don’t let the pros handle those issues, you’ll make for a bad wedding day and no one wants that, not even yourself.
It goes by VERY Quick
Your day will go by extremely fast, TRUST me. One of the things that usually happens when I meet couples to deliver my video in person is, they often tell me how much they missed during the day and how fast it goes by. Oh, and if you’re NOT having a wedding video, you really should because it’ll capture things that even wedding photographers can’t. no matter the excuse, be it a budget issue or you ‘forgot’, you’re really missing out if you are not planning to have one.
But that aside, couple are so busy meeting with family, friends and loved ones, plus all the traditional stuff they must do, like the first dance, cake cutting and speeches, they honestly have little time for themselves. Now, don’t get me wrong, they’re having the time of their lives, but it’s honestly a blur after the wedding is over and many couples have this feeling like they got hit by a bus, they’re drained from the wedding day.
And that’s perfectly normal.
Here’s my advice and you knew it was coming, hire a wedding videographer and have them capture the day for you. Having a film or even just a video will really make it worth while and you’ll be able to relive the day whenever you want.
Your Wedding is Actually Cookie Cutter
Now the big one, your wedding, well, it’s cookie cutter and that’s perfectly okay. No matter how much original thought you put into the décor, the colors and what you want at the wedding, it’s pretty much a cookie cutter, you’re just putting different frosting and toppings on the cookies that you buy, so to speak.
The chairs and the wedding venue that you chose, they had a wedding the weekend before and they’ll have another in a week or two after. Venues don’t really change, and most don’t offer a true unique experience. If you compare wedding photos or video form one wedding to another at the same venue, they’re very much alike.
That’s not a bad thing and truth be told its with every wedding vendor out there too. Sure, the minute details might change, but the overall arching wedding and reception that we do is pretty much the same.
The catering company, that awesome slider or cheese and fruit thing you ordered for the reception, they do it all the time, the wedding photographer and filmmaker, yeah, we have a process and we usually duplicate it throughout the wedding. The DJ will usually play the same tunes wedding to wedding with exception to the first dances and the special moments.
Now having everything cookie cutter isn’t a bad thing, it’s actually cost effective for you as a couple. The great thing about the wedding industry is that it’s still tailored to you to a point, but truth be told, everything we do in the industry is pretty, well normal for us. Of the nearly 500 wedding’s I’ve filmed, I’d say less than 25 were truly original- being done like no other, the other 95%, yeah pretty much weekend to weekend are the same.
Now, I will tell you that if you’re looking for that custom once in a lifetime experience wedding, you can have it but it will cost you, big time! The more you customize the wedding experience, the more it’s going to cost you.
For example, you want to arrive in a helicopter because it’s a unique thing to do, well thats not normal so expect to pay top dollar for something like that. But if you arrive in a car or limo, you’re going to still pay but not anywhere as much.
The more that the wedding day fits into the cookie cutter mold for example, the more you’re going to save or be on par with the average wedding cost within the region.
My Final Thoughts
Weddings are meant to be great, fun and enjoyable experiences for all. Relax and let the little things go. The more you relax the slower the day will go, let the professionals capture the day for you and have fun! Finally, put your own spin on your day with the little things the way you want them, staying within the wedding industry norm for the wedding will help keep the pocketbook in check and not break the bank either.